On to another goal - reading more!

So far, I've only written about my "cooking more" goal. As I continue to try to do so, I am also trying to throw in a few more things for the month of February!

I have begun to read a book we received as a wedding gift (when I say I have begun, I literally just read the introduction). No, I have not read a book since we have been married. Yes, that is embarrassing to admit. It's called Covenant Marriage by Gary Chapman. Even if I don't have it on my list of goals for this year, one goal I have is to always be working to improve our marriage!

Here are some excerpts I highlighted.

"For those who are married, marriage becomes the second most important relationship in life, the first and most important being one's relationship with God. Man's relationship with God is of utmost importance because it transcends time, and it greatly influences all relationships."

This is so true. The closer I get to God, the better my relationships with others are. To be completely open and honest, I feel like there was a time in my life (in college especially) when I felt closer to God. I think I have let the "busy-ness" of my everyday life get in the way and I intend to change that because not only is my reationship with God of utmost importance, but since it influences the rest of my relationships, it would make that part of my life even better!

Another thing I highlighted was: "Communication and intimacy are two of the most important aspects of developing a growing marriage." I'm understanding more and more each day of being married that communication is even more important to me than I thought it was. And I think it's especially important for me as a woman! Women get together and talk. You rarely see guys calling each other and wanting to go talk over a cup of coffee. They want to go shoot guns or see a movie or ride go-karts. We want to go sit at a cafe and chat and catch up!

Sadly, it's easy to start thinking that once you get married, you don't have to "get to know" each other anymore. And I think that because of this, we assume the other knows us well enough that we don't need to communicate our wants, needs, dreams, fears, etc. It's so important though! Whether you have been married for 2 months or 20 years, it's still important to communicate. Asking questions is probably the best way to start such a conversation, and it will make the other person really feel like what they have to say and their opinions matter, even after you've said "I do"!

I also liked this: "The secular concept of love focuses on feelings. In the Bible, love is not basically a feeling but an attitude expressed in an appropriate behavior. It is the attitude that chooces to build up another, to put their interest above your own interest. Love is something you choose to do."

I've known that love is not just a "feeling" but is actually a "choice" since before Isaac and I ever met. But I can say that I get it now more than ever! He still makes me feel warm and fuzzy and giddy all the time but I must say that once in a while, if it were up to my feelings, I wouldn't be the most loving wife... but even if I don't feel those warm fuzzy feelings, I know that I love him no matter what kind of mood I may be in that day because I choose to do so! How do you choose to love someone when you don't feel like it? I just remind myself constantly of why I love him. Whether it is because he is super selfless and loves helping others, or because he does little things to make my life easier and more stress-free, I remind myself of some of the reasons I married him to begin with!

Finally, I read: "Our love and intimacy may provide the strongest attraction to the non-Christian world--a world that desperately seeks love. Jesus said: All people will know that you are my disciples if you have love for one another. (John 13:35)"

The next couple chapters are about a covenant marriage versus a contract marriage. Can't wait to see what I find out and how I can be a better wife!